The SMU Ponies News Report, by Kerith Carman

Hi! This is Kerith Carman, coming to you live from the Carman household with today's SMU Mustangs Report!

As everyone knows, we've been struggling as a football team since that yucky football death penalty.

But in 2010, we are making a come back! So I have a few pointers for the Mustangs before they take on Houston this weekend.

First, give them the evil eye to increase the intimidation factor ...

Then grab them by the shoulder pads ...

and throw them to the ground! (without getting called for the horsecollar)

Then throw your bow at them and say, "There's more where that came from buddy! You just try to run it on us again!"

Then grab a new bow out of your pocket and run like the wind!

Kerith, how do you feel about TCU being ranked so high this year?

Kerith, "Frankly, I'd rather watch bear hinies twirl around above my head than watch the horned frogs play ball."

Now to my Co-Anchor Caleb in the back corner. Caleb, how do you feel about the future of Mustang football?

Caleb, "GO LONGHORNS!"

Thank you, Caleb, for that riveting input.

This has been Kerith, with your live Pony Report from Peaster, Texas. GO PONIES!

(See, I can already do Peruna ears with my fingers!)

That was a good news report. Boy, I'm hungry. Come on Caleb, share a little french toast?

Just between us, wink wink, Mom will never know.

No French Toast, no Long Horn wins, no Cowboy wins, MOOOOOOOMMMMM!