Potty Training, Take 5,439

Today I decided we were going to potty train at all costs. My resolve held out for about 8 hours, by the way. Anyway, I made everything as easy as possible for Caleb - pink lemonade to drink, watching Bugs Bunny from the potty if he wanted to sit, marshmallows in sight just waiting to reward him, and trips to the potty every 30 minutes was the plan.

Instead, he ended up sitting there most of the day. During both 15 minute breaks from the potty, he had accidents. He waits on the potty for hours until he gets off and then goes to the bathroom in his pants immediately.

After a 2 hour stint on the potty, I put his underwear on him and begged him to tell me when he needed to go. He prompty made a mess in his pants and ran around playing in them while I was on the phone with our insurance company. (You know how it goes, moms. I'd waited 3 days to get in touch with them, and they finally called. Kerith was screaming at me for putting her down so I could write while I talked to them, and then I see that Caleb has gone to the bathroom in his pants, all at the same time, and I can't get off the phone, because it's Friday, and I can't wait until Monday to talk to the insurance people.)

When I got off the phone and caught him, I was hot. I hauled him to the bathroom, so frustrated, and put him in the shower. He's not a huge fan of the shower, but I wasn't feeling too terribly sympathetic at this point. I soaped him down, saying, "Okay, turn your back into the water. Now turn and put your front in." In my head I'm thinking, "I know you can potty train, why are you so incooperative?" I told him again, "Okay, put your legs in, now your arms ..." And Caleb said, "Mommy, it's kind of like the hokey pokey!" (put your back in, put your back out ...) What can you do but laugh!

Oh well, maybe some day he'll potty train. If not, I hear it's a great way to keep them from dating too early, right?